What Really Matters?

I get asked this question all the time
“How do you do it all”?

I’m never quite sure how to respond.

I mean, what, exactly, is “it all”?
I used to provide a somewhat lengthy response

“oh, you know, I don’t watch much TV….I have a very supportive husband who does a LOT….my house isn’t really that clean……..etc”.

Lately, I’ve changed my answer.  Now I say “you always have time for the things you put first”.  It sums up all of the above, and more.  It says everything I want to say, without having to explain myself too much, and, most importantly, it’s true.

Parenting is always a challenging undertaking.  As far as I can tell, that never stops.
There are beautiful, magical, heart-warming days, and there are days when you feel like you will never come up for air again.

Lately, I’m focusing more on the little moments with my kids. The moments that I feel I can have some control over.

These moments, the moments where I put down my technology and spent 15 minutes drawing with my daughter.
These moments, where we keep our weekends as free as possible so that we can enjoy family time together.
These moments, when the supper table is magically free from whining, stalling and other general unpleasantness and we can talk about our days.


I’m focusing here, in these moments, and it has made me a lot calmer, and a lot happier.

I’m putting quality time first.

I plan ahead, so I’m less rushed.
I schedule carefully, so we don’t overcommit.
I say no to some things, to make room for other things.
Always full of big ideas, I save many of those ideas for later.  There will be time for those things, they don’t all have to happen right now.
I try to let go when things don’t go quite according to plan.
I simplify.
I make time for reading together. For playing together, even if that means that all of the laundry doesn’t get finished today.
I make time for myself, which makes me a 100% better parent.

You always have time for the things you put first.

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